Alright, here is the scoop. The numbers did rise...but not anywhere near 360! Our number today as 221.70. Uggg, why aren't they going up...I mean they are going up, but why not up enough? So...after talking to the nurse who talked to the doctor- here is the plan.
They are glad that the numbers are still rising. That is a good sign. However, they are still not rising as they expect them too. There is no way of knowing right now if this is a potential chemical pregnancy or one that won't make it...so we are flying to Texas on Monday for a sonogram and another beta. Yeah, that's right...I have to wait 6 days!!!!! 6 days to know if anything is going on inside. This is a horrible feeling. My nurse Katie said there is no way of knowing what this scenario will bring about- it's just too early. They are hoping that my numbers will rise in these 6 days and that we will hopefully be able to see something Monday. So, that could be the day we either see our baby for the first time- or see nothing! I am scared to death.
I feel like everything is falling apart. I know my numbers rose and that is what we wanted...I just can't help but think I might be getting a "taste" of pregnancy but then won't get the full appetite? I do trust God and I know His plans are much bigger and better than I can imagine, but I am scared to death. I don't want this pregnancy to end or never really even get started.
I am so thankful my numbers are rising- but I just wish I knew why they weren't rising as fast as we all thought they would. I was so excited about the first beta- I mean 116- that is a great first beta. I had my expectations set to high I suppose. I am really struggling with this whole process. I just don't want to have my feet planted when we found out we were actually pregnant...only to have them kicked out from under me. Is that too much to ask for? I don't even know what to pray for anymore...I don't know what to say!
So, here we are...hoping for the best, but I guess preparing for the worst. Only time will tell...and this time is much harder than the 2 week wait! Please continue to pray for us. I am praying so hard that the little one inside me will keep growing. He/she may be a slow grower, but I pray they make it all the way to the finish line...maybe not as quickly as everyone else planned or by their standards- but these are God's standards and expectations! He has it all under control!
My College Graduate
2 weeks ago
30 comments:
Just wanted to let you know that I am constantly in prayer for you, your hubby and that precious little one. GOD IS GOOD!! HE can do ANYTHING! ((HUGS))
Hold on to the good. The numbers went up. That is great! God is holding you and your baby through this. Lots of love and prayers!
I can only imagine how frustrating this is. I pray that you will see a baby growing next Monday! Maybe 2 implanted, but only 1 is continuing to grow? I think that is similar to what happened to me since my numbers did rise and there were 2 other sacs that didn't develop. Sorry you have to wait. I hope the time will pass quickly!
(((hugs)) I said a prayer for you!
Praying for good news and a strong heartbeat on Monday!
Praying for peace for you and hubby and health for the little one. Waiting and uncertainty are so hard! I'm so glad the numbers are going up, and I'm really hoping for good news on Monday.
You and your little one are in my prayers!
I pray peace over you in this time and that this little one shall live in Jesus name!! hold on, hold on hold on there are lots of success stories about betas not rising as high!!!!
Oh Sarah, what torture!!! Just said a prayer for you... Hugs!
Sarah - I read your comment on the LPM Blog tonight, from Melissa's post. I am going to be praying for you sweet girl.
I want to encourage you too. My own son and daughter-in-law went through this journey that you and your husband are on. They celebrated their 5th anniversary in May, and are the parents of a little boy that will be 11 months old this Friday. My Blog is dedicated to the joy of having him. Come visit - go to the first few posts from last July.
Bless you Sarah. I was so touched by your post - it stirred up so many emotions in my heart from the past 4 years.
Much love,
Georgia Jan
I have been praying for you ALL day...and no it looks like I have more time to pray!!!!
I am praying for the numbers to MORE than double. To almost TRIPLE.
I am praying the time flies by and you are just smothered in the loving arms of Christ.
Big hugs,
kendra
Sarah- I know the Beta "game" is often bittersweet. I'm praying for you. I pray this time passes quickly for you. I hope that you get to see a beautiful little heartbeat. When you said I don't even know what to pray for.... I completely know what you mean. Sending you many many doubling #'s vibes!!!! (((((((((hugs)))))))))))
haley
I really hope you have a lot planned for the next 6 days to keep you busy. I'm so sorry you have to wait that long, but I'm praying so hard that you see your baby on Monday!
I'm still praying!!!
praying that the next 6 days will FLY BY!! and praying for those numbers to keep rising.
You are in my thoughts and prayers! ((hugs))
You're really in my thoughts and every time I think of you, I say a prayer. Remember that God is faithful. So faithful!
Praying for God to give you peace as you wait, and continued joy for the journey....blessings from the Grammie in Canada!
I know EXACTLY how you are feeling. I will pray that the next 6 days fly by and you get to see your baby on that sonogram. Rest on the promises of the Lord. I love you and am sending you so many hugs!!! Keep the faith..keep the faith!! Keep the faith!!
Praying so hard for you and your little one!!!!
I've been following your blog for a while now, I don't know if I've ever commented- but I'm praying for you!
It's hard to remain positive in uncertainty, all you can do is cherish these moments that God gives you. Relax in the mindset that God is writing your journey!
I'm praying that you will find peace, and that you completely relax until you can see your little one. :O)
Good luck with everything- you have so many people wanting this for you and lifting you up in the name of Jesus!!
I know that this has got to be so hard to just sit and wait, but stay faithful-I can only imagine what you are going through...bless your heart! You know that through God all things are possible, so I will pray that you will find your peace in that. Your journey is just beginning and know that I am praying for you and your little one!
Natalie
Sarah, I can't imagine the agony of having to wait until Monday to know more. In part, I can...but everyone's experience is so different and I want to acknowledge that! Please know that I am hoping and praying with you and for you!
I am praying for you.
Sarah,
You are in the right place honey. You are right, God has it all under control. Sometimes when I don't know how to pray or what to pray, I just remember that God knows the prayers in my heart I can quite say or know how to say. And a comfort for me is praying the Lord's Prayer. There are a few verses that God has used in my life, Isaiah 40:29 "He gives strenth to the weary, and to him who lacks might He increases power." and 1 Thessalonians 5:24 "The One who calls you is faithful and He will do it" and Hebrews 10:35-36 "So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded, you need to preserve so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised." Psalm 138:8 "The Lord will fulfill His purpose for me." Sarah no matter what God's purpose or timing in producing life in your womb, just remember He is ALWAYS faithful, He is your STRENGTH and your security. Place your confidence in Him and He will keep you through this time. I will continue praying for you and your husband, no matter how long the journey. Thank you for allowing me this privelege to join you during this time in prayer. You are a brave woman.
~Elise
Praying for you and praying that Monday gets here in a hurry!
Sarah, I have been praying for you and will continue to do so. I hope Monday has good news and until then, I pray that the Lord will surround you with peace and calm! Nothing is too big for Him and even though this doesn't appear textbook perfect doesn't mean it won't end with a baby! Stay positive!
Just like the song says, you have to believe! He says that he can move mountians! If he can move my mountian he can move your mountian too! You have to stay strong!
Don't be scared, Sarah. Even though I'm praying, I still believe you are fine.
Praying for you!!
I have faith Sarah!! I am praying so hard!!!
Post a Comment